Conversations with Cooper - Part 10

Cooper: Why do we have horse vepeet?
Allison and me: Huh?
Cooper: Why do we have to horse vepeet?
Allison and me: We don't understand what you mean? What is horse vepeet?
Cooper: You know. When you horse vepeet to a party.
Allison and me: (After laughing hysterically) You mean R.S.V.P.

Kids are so funny!

Additional Benefits to Exercise

Allison and I both started running a long time ago. I started running when she was in law school and she started running when we lived in Lexington. We have both continued to run consistently ever since, and really enjoy running together. When she was pregnant with Cooper she took a break from running, but picked up back up after he was born. We have increased the amount we run and have both ran several half marathons.

One of the best investments we made in preparation for having a baby was the purchase of a good jogging stroller. We have taken Cooper running in the stroller since he was born. I can't begin to count the number of miles that our stroller has on it. It has held up well and we continue to use it today. Over the last several months, however, Cooper has become more and more interested in running. When we take him on a run in the stroller he often objects and says he wants to run along with us. Usually we can convince him to ride for most of the run and get out and run occasionally. I have the feeling that those days are numbered.

A few months ago Cooper brought home a sheet to sign up for the ING Kids Rock Nashville. One day while talking about the race Cooper told us that he wanted to participate. We explained to him that he would have to run several times prior to the race and then the race would be the day after "mom's race." He seemed really excited and reminded me several times that he wanted to do the race and made sure that I signed him up.

Sunday afternoon we went on our first run together. Cooper and I stretched and took off running. I had determined we would run a half mile and then stop to see how he felt. We did that, he rested for a few minutes and declared that he was ready to go again. We talked a little about how long a marathon was and I explained to him that he has to run 25.7 miles prior to his race and that he will run the remaining half mile on race day. Upon hearing this he told me that he thought he could run all 25 miles at once! We had a great time and I was really proud of him. Not only did he run the entire half mile to begin, he rested for about 5 minutes and then ran the second half mile faster than he ran the first.

It appears to me that one of the potential benefits to consistently exercising is that your children may grow up to enjoy and engage in regular exercise. We all know about the childhood obesity problem that exists in America today. I am hoping that by exposing Cooper to running and exercise generally at a young age will encourage him to live an active, healthy lifestyle. We are starting to see some of this in Cooper, especially over the last several months.

Good Friends

Allison and I are blessed with many good friends. Friends we work with, friends we go to church with, friends we grew up with, and the list can go on and on. Some of our best friends, the Becks, came to visit last week. Because they live in Baton Rouge and we live in Nashville, our time together is usually limited to a few visits each year. Each time we get to visit with them, however, I'm reminded of how much their family means to our family.

The picture above is of all of our kids. When we first met the Becks they had been married almost a year and we had been married about 5 months. As you can tell, our families have grown and changed over the past 11+ years. I'm thankful for the time we got to spend with them this past week and even more thankful for their friendship over the years.

The More Things Change...

Our pastor is preaching through the Bible chronologically during 2013. As a church we are reading through the passages each week that Mark will preach on the following Sunday. This week's Scripture is Exodus 5-28.

Part of Wednesday's reading was Exodus 16. At this point the Israelites hadn't been out of Egypt for 2 months. And already they are complaining. While they are mainly complaining about being hungry, they are also complaining about being out of Egypt. 

"If only we had died by the Lord’s hand in the land of Egypt, when we sat by pots of meat and ate all the bread we wanted. Instead, you brought us into this wilderness to make this whole assembly die of hunger!" Exodus 16:3

That's right, complaining about not being slaves any more. Because they "sat by pots of meat and ate all the bread [they] wanted." But you know what? How often do we do this? How often do we have a good thing going and simply wish we had what we were used to? We get so used to being comfortable that we aren't willing to be stretched, even if in the long run it will be a much better situation?

Most people are resistant to change. We want what's comfortable. God doesn't promise comfortable. He commands us to make disciples. And that can be messy. And uncomfortable. And much tougher than sitting on the sidelines. Let's get off of the sidelines and start making disciples. Even if that means we don't get sit by pots of meat and eat all the bread we want. Because you never know, there may be all the manna you need right around the corner.

Here We Go Again

I think this is about the 10th time I've "started over," but I'm going to make another run at this blog. I have the passion to be a good and consistent writer. Being a numbers guy, that's weird, but I'm going to try again. For those that stumble across this, thanks and stay with me. I'm not promising it will be good writing, but I am going to try my best for it to be consistent. Until next time...

Why I Love Her

A while back I read a post on the Refine Us blog about why you fell in love with your spouse. The premise of the post was about not dwelling on the things that bother you about your spouse, rather, focusing on the things that caused you to fall in love with him/her. The post got me thinking about making a list. In the post the person that Justin was talking to was only focusing on what bothered him about his spouse. In doing this, it was helping to deteriorate his marriage.

Let me be clear, we are not having marital problems. Also, I am not making this list because I need to take my focus off of what bothers me. I simply thought making a list could be a good exercise for any of us that are married to be reminded why we fell in love with our spouse.

God has certainly blessed me with a wonderful woman who chose to marry me. I can't imagine my life without her and I don't tell her nearly enough how much I appreciate her and love her. Smalls, thanks for the last 11+ years of marriage. You are far more than anything I could ever ask for.

- she loves Jesus
- her kindness towards others
- she rarely has a bad day
- she loves me unconditionally- she has a great smile
- she loves college football
- she's not afraid to tell me how it is, or how it should be
- she's a great mom (obviously this didn't make me fall in love with her, but it's an added bonus)

Your turn. What are some reasons why you fell in love with your spouse?

Election Day 2012

Today is election day. I have heard it said over the last several months that this is the most important election in our lifetime. I bet that will be said for every election for the rest of my lifetime. Mainly because as long as, for all intents and purposes, there's a two party system, the others side is going to think it's imperative that their candidate win.

No matter which way you lean or which party/candidate you hope will win, make sure your voice is heard by getting out and voting. There are many countries around the world in which some or all of the people aren't allowed to vote. And, there are a lot of men and women that have sacrificed a lot in order for us to have the privilege to vote.

We also need to be in prayer for our leaders, no matter which side wins. These men and women are making daily decisions that, directly or indirectly, affect our lives everyday. Please join me in praying for our leaders today and everyday and they make decisions that affect our country.

And, in my opinion, if you don't vote then you don't have any right to complain.

Dusting Off the Ol' Blog

Okay, so my last post was on March 29. Ridiculous. Life has been sort of busy and every time I thought to write I either didn't want to or simply didn't have time.

A lot has gone on since we wrecked our Highlander, including getting a new Highlander, a visit from our friend Ashley and her 3 girls, lots of swimming at the pool, wrecking the Accord, getting the Accord fixed, softball, kickball, vacation, another season of softball, a trip to the Smokey Mountains, me seeing Allison argue in front of the 6th Circuit Court of Appeals, Cooper's fall baseball season, a trip to Lexington, Halloween at the Hoods, and tomorrow is Election Day 2012. And I'm sure I've left a few big ticket items out.

Either way, I'm going to try to get back in the blogging saddle again.

Until next time...

Laid to Rest

Some, if not all, of you know that we were in an accident Sunday morning. Thankfully no one was hurt. My Highlander, on the other hand, will not be coming home. Yesterday afternoon Cooper and I went to the body shop to get the few remaining things out that we needed and paid our final respects. As we were pulling off Cooper said, "Bye, bye Highlander."

It was a great vehicle. Allison and I both agree that we should probably get another one to replace that one. The problem is, I am very cheap and cars are not.

Have you ever totaled a car? Did you replace is with the same make/model?

Conversations With Cooper - Part 9

As I've mentioned recently, Allison and I have been making smoothies for breakfast. There are various flavor combinations that we are using and Cooper generally wants some as well. Today we had chocolate banana and so I made him one too.

Over the weekend Allison went to an even at church and heard a nutritionist speak. One thing she mentioned was that fresh spinach is good to put into smoothies because it adds some vegetables and doesn't alter the taste. My first thought this morning was to make Cooper's without spinach, but I decided to go ahead thinking that because it is blended well he wouldn't notice. As he was drinking it I asked him if it was good.

Me: How's you smoothie Coop?

Cooper: Good. What's that green stuff in it?

Me: (As Allison turns her head and starts to laugh) Huh? Green stuff? I'm not sure. Is it good.

Cooper: Yeah.

Me: I don't think there's green stuff in there.

Cooper: Yeah there is. I'm looking straight at it. (much more laughing from Allison)

Me: Is it good?

Cooper: Yeah.

Me: Oh well. Don't worry about it then.

You can't get anything past him. He pays major attention to detail. Thankfully I didn't have to tell him there was spinach in the drink or he would never drink one again.

What have you tried to get past your kids recently that didn't work out as well as you planned?

Eating Differently and Moving More Intensly

When Allison was in law school I hung out with my friend Jeff quite a bit. We rode mountain bikes, got coffee, and talked a lot about God and fitness. As I look back on those days I now realize that when Jeff and I rode mountain bikes he probably felt as though we were crawling through molasses (I'm not getting into my first mountain bike excursion with Jeff here on the blog).

As I began to lose weight and get faster on the bike and on foot, people would often ask me "what have you done to lose all that weight." Regularly I would tell them exactly what Jeff used to say to me when I would ask him where I needed to start: "eat less and move more." Everyone wanted a secret formula to how I had lost 40 pounds in 2 months. But there wasn't one. I simply at about 25% less than what I had been eating in the first month and in the second month I added running about 10-15 miles per week. That's it.


As you can read here and here, I made some adjustments to my fitness and health plan at the first of the year. This time it wasn't really how much I was eating, it was what I was eating. After making these changes and increasing the intensity during my time at the gym, I have really made some strides when it comes to my body. As of last Friday I was down to 179 pounds (down 18 pounds from 197 pounds) and 15.1% body fat (down from probably at least 22%).


I don't write this to brag. I simply write this to tell people that it can be done. With some effort in your eating habits and additional effort in the gym or on the streets of your neighborhood, you can change the way you look and feel.


Is it easy? No. Does it hurt at the gym? Yes. Is it worth it? To me, absolutely!


Have you made any significant changes or commitments to your health lately? How are they coming along?

Favorite Part of the Day

Because the three of us commute together almost everyday, Allison and I have Cooper's attention on the way to and from work. For the most part, we take this opportunity on the way home to talk to Cooper about his day. We try to ask him pointed, open-ended questions so he has to tell about what he did. I initially got this idea from Michael Hyatt's blog, and one thing that I try to ask Cooper every day is "What was your favorite part of the day?" Many times it's "we played," or "painting," but sometimes it's much more specific.

Not long ago Cooper asked me to come to his school to eat lunch with him. I told him I definitely would that week, but I wasn't sure which day it would be. We settled on Wednesday, which I knew was a little disappointing for him. As we were dropping him off on Monday morning I looked at my calendar and realized I had a meeting on Wednesday right in the middle of the time that his class eats lunch. Once I realized this I decided that I would come that day. When he finished washing his hands I asked him if it would be alright if I came that day instead of Wednesday. He said yes and I could tell he was really excited.

When I showed up he was still very excited. He was pumped, not only that I was there, but because we got our own table. He told all of his friends that I was there  and we had a great time together.

That afternoon when I picked him up I started asking him the usual questions. He answered and as I looked in the rear view mirror I could tell he was waiting on me to ask what he favorite part of the day was. When I asked him he face lit up and he said "Having lunch with you there." My response was "that was my favorite part of the day too buddy!" And it absolutely was.

I often say that it's the little things. For me to take an hour, walk over to Cooper's day care, and sit with him and eat lunch really isn't a big deal. But to that five year old little boy it meant the world. We, as dads, have to major in the minors with our kids. It's not how many toys you buy them or what you do for them. It's what you do with them that matters most to them. I learned this lesson and hopefully I don't have to keep re-learning it in the future. Maybe I can take what I've learned and expound on it.

Dads, what have you done recently that made your kids day? What little things (in our mind) can we be doing that are huge to our kids?

Following Up

A few weeks ago I posted about my fitness challenge I have given myself. I want to follow up with some of what we have changed and the results that are in so far.

We haven't really changed anything drastically, but we've definitely changed some things. One of the main things we have changed is our eating habits. Several months ago Allison wanted to change the amount of sweets we consumed. She felt that 3 days a week were enough, so we (I use this loosely) started limiting ourselves to sweets three times per week. While that was a good idea, I wasn't really motivated but still complied for the most part. As I before, at the end of the year I got on the scale and did not like what I saw, so the first thing I did was talk to a friend from work about nutrition. We talked about what he does and Allison and I have modified it to work for us and it has really made a significant difference in the first three weeks of the year.

We are now eating smoothies, made at home, for breakfast. We have 3 different versions that we make from chocolate banana, to berry, to coconut. They all have the same basic ingredients, but some changes in order to mix it up a little. The other main thing we've implemented is that we limit the amount of cheat meals to 4 per week. This includes breakfast, lunch, and dinner so we have to be pretty strategic about it. This, however, gives us a chance to make better choices, but still have some meals where we feel that we can have what we want. I am also happy to report that I am gladly complying with the 3 days of sweets per week.

The other thing we've done is changed our training for race we are running in a few weeks. We have changed from pounding out mileage to high intensity training. I think this has sort of shocked my metabolism into a frenzy, along with my body getting food that it can burn efficiently.

Overall I am very pleased with my results so far. As of this morning I have lost 13 pounds and weigh 184, down from 197. I haven't had my body fat tested, but plan to in the next week or so. I am in the range that I feel I need to be in, weight-wise. I could stand to lose a few more pounds, but as of now I don't plan to make any more significant changes.

One of my goals for 2012 is to maintain a healthy weight throughout the year. This is a good start and something I intend to diligently keep up with.

Do you have any goals for 2012? How are you doing so far in keeping them?

We're Gonna Do What?

Well, it's official. Me, Allison, a co-worker of Allison's, a law school classmate of Allison's, a spouse of a co-worker of Allison's, and one yet to be determined member have signed up for the Rouge Orleans, a 126.2 mile ultra marathon. We talked about it last year, but didn't act on it. As of yesterday we are registered. Now comes the hard part, training and racing. This is unlike any race we've ever done before. In this race each of the 6 team members will run 5 legs of 3-5 miles. While Allison and I have ran 3-5 miles many times, we've never done it 5 times in a 20 hour period. We are really excited about this though. It will be a great experience, the team is full of great people, and we get to see of great friends the Becks. As crazy as it may sound, I can't wait!

Fitness/Nutrition Adventure

I am thinking of doing a little experiment. Well, hopefully it won't be an experiment. I am hoping it will be a life changing decision followed by a few life changes. If you know me or read this blog much you probably know that I, for the most part, enjoy exercise. I try to exercise several times per week. I enjoy running, biking, swimming, as well as working out in the gym. While much of this takes discipline, I don't really claim to have much in that category.

What I don't really enjoy is disciplined nutrition. I will admit, I am horrible on this end of fitness. In fact, you can just call me the cookie monster. I like them in all types--chocolate chip, white chocolate macadamia, sugar, frosted...you get the point. While I am fairly fit, I know that if I can get my eating and nutrition under control I can be much more so.

The main reason I want this is for Allison and Cooper. Now I'm not going to sit here and tell you that I won't enjoy looking and feeling better, because I will. But there are some startling facts about the men in my relatively immediate family. The most glaring is they don't live very long. And by not very long, I mean, most of them haven't reached age 65. 

When I am 65 Allison and I will have been married for 43 years. That's hard to believe even as I type it. If the first 10 1/2 are any indication, however, I want much more than 43. I mean, seriously. I love being married to her. And I can't imagine cutting our marriage short simply because I wasn't disciplined in what I ate and didn't control things that I had complete control over.

When I am 65 Cooper will be 37. At the current trend of when people have kids he will probably have a child that is 7ish. Now that's not a very long time to spend with a grandchild. And from what I understand, having grandchildren around is awesome! I mean what's not to love about taking a kid fun places, giving them treats, and the sending them home to their parents!

So here is my plan. I am changing the way I eat. I will continue to exercise the way I have been for a few years, but the nutrition side is getting a make over. I am not completely sure what this makeover will look like, but I know it will look a lot less sugary. Below are two figures (no pun intended) that I am going to monitor. I know these aren't the only things that determine healthiness, but these are the most visible and probably the easiest to measure at any given moment. As time progresses I will post about how this is going as well as any progress (one way or the other) that I make.


weight - 197 lbs (my scales at home)
body fat - 21.2% (as of 10/20/11; I assume it is a little higher right now, but I don't know for sure)


This, by coincidence, happens to be the first of a new year. It is not a resolution, but one of my goals for 2012 is to maintain a healthier weight. I am hoping that it is a start to a healthier me.


Are there fitness/nutritional changes you need to make? Did you make any in 2011 that made a difference in your life?

Hiatus

I've been on a blogging hiatus for the last, I don't know, 6 weeks or so. When I committed to two posts a week I had every intention of keeping up with that. For a while I was able to, but I haven't posted at all since Cooper's birthday. I am not sure there is a reason. Sort of like the snowball effect that I wrote about regarding exercise, not posting just sort of snowballed on me. I didn't set out to take a hiatus, it just sort of happened.

As I have said on here many times, being creative is hard for me. Even when I am just writing about everyday life, most of the time it's hard for me. Words rarely flow out with ease. Then add on top of that my desire to not just blog to be blogging, it makes is that much more difficult. I am thinking through what I want my blog to look like. I may start over somewhere else, I may continue right here (sort of a grand re-opening), or I may just give it up and try to write/be creative some other way. I don't know. We'll see what comes of it. But for now I am not making any promises.

Do you ever have trouble writing? What do you do to get back on track?

Five. Years. Old.

It seems like just yesterday he was born. Just yesterday he said "Papa" for the first time. Just yesterday he took his first steps. Just yesterday he told me and his mama he loved us for the first time. Just yesterday he told us he didn't like dinner. Okay, maybe that was yesterday, but man, I can't believe our boy is 5 years old today.

Cooper,

I can't believe you are five years old. This time next year you will be almost half way through kindergarten. The old cliche says "time flies when you're having fun," and that's exactly what you mom and I do as your parents.

You are a joy to be around. You have a big, loving personality. For the most part, you know what you want and when you want it. You love school, so much so that you get upset many days when I come to pick you up. You are starting to take an interest in sports. Many days this summer and fall you and I played outside kicking the soccer ball until mom was finished making dinner. You love to build things. You love Legos and Lincoln Logs.

You love to read books. Every night before you go to bed you ask how many books we can read. On nights that we are out late or have other things to do, you are bummed if we don't get to read. You are a good boy. You have your moments for sure, but I think that is just you trying to find your way. You have a kind, caring, loving spirit. I hope that never changes. I am so glad God chose me and your mom to be your parents. I love you and look forward to seeing what the future holds for you.

Dad

Day one

Around your first b'day. You loved the Leapfrog Farm

 Just after your second b'day. You have always loved to "help."

You got this from Big Daddy for your third b'day. You have always loved Spiderman!

Celebrating being four with mom. You love your mommy!

Your last day as a four year old. I can't believe it!

The Snowball Effect

Many of you reading this know that I enjoy exercise. As a young person, I always thought that running was something you did as punishment or if someone was chasing you. When Allison was in law school, and I was about 60 pounds overweight, I started running. At first it was hard. I didn't enjoy it, but I kept at it. I started by running a 5k. Over the next several years I continued to run several days a week and ran several more 5k races. As I lost weight and got faster I noticed something: I felt terrible on the days that I didn't run or do some other type of exercise.

As I continued my running journey, I began to run longer distances. I started with 4 miles, then 5, etc. At some point I decided to train for a half marathon and now I have completed 4. As I look back on training I can see a definite pattern: the more I ran, the more I wanted to run. I have recently see the opposite hold true in general exercise for me.

Two weeks ago I went to lunch with friends several times. I didn't work out regularly that week and made many poor food choices. At the end of the week I told Allison, "I had a terrible week eating and exercising, but next week is a new weeks." As that week started I felt myself wanting to skip the gym and go out to eat. Each time I went to the gym or ran outside it was like torture.

I truly believe that the "snowball effect" has a big impact on my exercising, good or bad. If I go to the gym often, I am excited, or at least, look forward to going. If, however, I don't go several days in a row I find myself not wanting to go. I think the obvious thing here is to continue going to the gym. What I want to figure out is how to keep the negative snowball effect from taking over if I miss a few days.

Does the snowball effect get you? How do you overcome this in your life or workout routine?

Conversations with Cooper - Part 8

Last week we were driving home from dinner. We were listening to a CD that we got for Cooper that has songs that the preschoolers will be singing during their preschool choir presentation. As part of the CD the story of Jesus is told and at one point it talks about Mary and Jesus being at the inn when Jesus was born. If you remember last week, at this point things can go in any direction with Cooper.

Cooper: Mom, do girls have to be married to have a baby?

Me: Mom? (I mean, he asked her so I thought she should handle this one.)

Allison: Well, it's best if girls are married before they have a baby.

Me: God says he wants us to be married before we decide to have a baby.

Cooper: Yep, and not everyone should have a baby!

That, my boy, is very true. And more insightful than you even know! These questions are something else. I am often amazed and the questions he asks. While they are many times tough to answer on a 5 year old level, I appreciate that he is very inquisitive and honestly wouldn't want it any other way.

Sick to My Stomach

Friday night, Allison and I attended a Secret Church simulcast at church. The title was Family, Marriage, Sex, and the Gospel. For those that don't know, Secret Church is a 6 hour, intense Bible study taught by David Platt, pastor at The Church at Brook Hills in Birmingham, Alabama. This is my third time to attend Secret Church. It is a lot like drinking out of a fire hose, but the thing I love about it is I generally can't stop thinking about it for days. This time was no different.

During the first teaching segment many statistics were discussed. Many, if not most, of the statistics were astounding. I can't tell you the number of times I shook my head, my mouth fell open, or I simply closed my eyes because of what I was hearing. Many of the statistics were directed toward men. Platt also talked a lot about men and how we refuse to grow up and be what God designed us to be. For example:

• 1 out of every 10 men have purchased a prostitute;
• $13.3 billion was spent on pornography in the U.S. in 2006;
• today there are 40 million prostitutes at work;
• 130,000 abortions occur everyday;

Of 1,000 pastors surveyed:

• 38% said they were divorced or currently in the process;
• 30% said they had a one time or an ongoing affair;
• 50% of pastors say they have visited a pornography site in the last year;
• 30%  have done so in the past month.

These are some scary, scary statistics!

I am not sure what, but I have to do something. As I listened to these statistics I couldn't help but think, "Between me and my friends, statistically there are several of us that struggle with this or are in a situation they shouldn't be in." I am currently thinking through how my friends and I can hold each other more accountable.

What would you do to hold friends accountable to guard against these issues?